» Who Are You Trying to Be?

How you portray yourself, and how your personality comes across in social media makes or breaks any momentum you can create.

Just as there are social skills offline, there are social skills online too.

For some people this all comes automatically and no thought comes into play at all. It is as natural as breathing.

It is the same in the face to face world, there are those who have to try hard and plan every interaction consciously, and other people who breeze through life as a social butterfly with a charismatic approach that has been with them since birth.

In the flesh I am the awkward and nervous type in social situations, but online I am more “me”.

To cope in physical settings I have developed some coping tactics, but mainly I avoid unnecessary opportunities to display my lack of interpersonal confidence. Of course I have to do public speaking as part of my job but strangely this is quite different, I still get nervous but in a different way, almost like I put on a performance.

Where people often fall down is by trying to be something they are not.

People are very good at spotting a fake, and especially with all the tools that are now available, and the very long memory of the internet due to the Google cache and services like the Wayback Machine, it is not worth the risk of being found  out. At the very least people can instantly see when your words do not match your actions.

Gary V - got to love him, but don't try to BE him

There is no way on this earth I can ever be a high energy, confident speaker like Gary Vaynerchuck.

I am me, and no amount of coaching is going to change that. But at the same time, Gary has his audience and I have mine. Just like I could never be Gary, also my audience are likely to connect with me for a reason, and one of those reasons is there is already a Gary Vee, that is taken, so they want what I have to say and how.

By trying to be something you are not you will be sacrificing the things that make you special, the approach, style, personality, experience and wisdom that you alone can share. Rather than avoid being what makes you who you are, you should celebrate and utilize it.

This is why now more than ever, instead of building a brand you should find out what ingredients you already have and draw them out. This goes for companies and individuals.

Bring to the fore the exact qualities that make up your specific recipe for success.

People will connect with you because of who you are, not despite it, you will come across as much more approachable and authentic, and will never have to fear being revealed as a fraud.